Characteristics of a Muslim Husband

No one ever thinks about the characteristics of a Muslim husband. It is always what a wife should do for the husband…and the list never ends; home management, tutoring, ferrying the kids, caring, cooking, cleaning, washing, working, you name it, she is doing it. so what about the brothers?

Our beloved Prophet SAW was not like this. So, why the men of this
Ummah? It is quite interesting. So I thought I’d share it with you!!!
What a Muslim husband should be like…

1. Dress up for your wife, look clean and smell good.. Click here to join nidokidos When was the last
time you went shopping for designer pyjamas? Just like the husband wants
his wife to look nice for him, she also wants her husband to dress up
for her too. Remember that the Prophet (PBUH) would always start with
Miswak when returning home and always loved the sweetest smells.

2. Use the best names for your wife.Click here to join nidokidos Call your wife by the most beloved
names to her, and avoid using names that hurt their feelings.

3. Don’t treat her like a fly. We never think about a fly in our daily
lives until it ‘bugs’ us. Similarly, a wife will do well all day – which
brings no attention from the husband – until she does something to ‘bug’
him.. Don’t treat her like this; recognize all the good that she does
and focus on that.

4. If you see wrong from your wife, try being silent and do not comment! Click here to join nidokidos
This is one of the ways the Prophet (PBUH) used when he would see
something inappropriate from his wives (R.A). It’s a technique that few
Muslim men have mastered.

5. Smile at your wife whenever you see her Click here to join nidokidos and embrace her often..
Smiling is Sadaqah and your wife is not exempt from the Muslim Ummah.
Imagine life with her constantly seeing you smiling. Remember also those
Ahadith when the Prophet (PBUH) would kiss his wife before leaving for
Salaah, even when he was fasting.

6. Thank her for all that she does for you. Click here to join nidokidos Then thank her again! Take
for example a dinner at your house. She makes the food, cleans the home,
and a dozen other tasks to prepare. And sometimes the only
acknowledgment she receives is that there needed to be more salt in the
soup. Don’t let that be; thank her!

7. Ask her to write down the last ten things you did for her that made
her happy. Click here to join nidokidos Then go and do them again. It may be hard to recognize what
gives your wife pleasure. You don’t have to play a guessing game, ask
her and work on repeating those times in your life.

8. Don’t belittle her desires. Click here to join nidokidos Comfort her. Sometimes the men may look
down upon the requests of their wives. The Prophet (PBUH) set the
example for us in an incident when Safiyyah (R.A) was crying because, as
she said, he had put her on a slow camel. He wiped her tears, comforted
her, and brought her the camel.

9. Be humorous and play games with your wife. Look at how the Prophet
(PBUH) would race with his wife Aisha (R.A) in the desert. When was the
last time we did something like that?

10. Always remember the words of Allah’s Messenger (PBUH): ‘The best of
you are those who treat their families the best. And I am the best
amongst you to my family.’ Try to be the best!

In conclusion: Never forget to make Dua to Allah – ta’ala to make your
marriage successful. And Allah ta’ala knows best!!

http://www.facebook.com/notes/niqab-the-face-veil/characteristics-of-a-muslim-husband/276815231430

Why are women turning to Islam?

Why Are Women Turning to Islam

At a time when Islam is faced with hostile media coverage particularly where the status of women in Islam is concerned, it may be quite surprising to learn that Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world, and even more ironic to discover that the majority of converts to Islam are WOMEN .The status of women in society is neither a new issue, nor is it a fully settled one. And where Islam is mentioned, for many the term ‘Muslim Women’ prompts images of exhausted mothers chained to the stove, ‘victims’ suppressed in a life of indoctrination, frantic to be westernized and so on. Others will go to great lengths to explain how the hijaab is an obstacle, clouding the mind, and comment that female converts are either brainwashed, stupid or traitors to their sex. I reject such accusations and pose to them the following question: why is it that so many women who have been born and brought in the so called ‘civilized’ societies of Europe and America are willing to reject their ‘liberty’ and ‘independence’ to embrace a religion that supposedly oppresses them and is widely assumed to be prejudicial to them?

As a Christian convert to Islam, I can only present my personal experience and reasons for rejecting the ‘freedom’ that women claim to have in this society in favour of the only Religion that truly liberates women by giving us a status and position, which is completely unique when compared with that of our non-Muslim counterparts. Before coming to Islam, I had strong feminist tendencies and recognized that where a woman was concerned, a lot of shuffling around had been going on, yet without being able to pin her on the social map. The problem was ongoing: new ‘women’s issues’ being raised without the previous ones being satisfactorily resolved.

Like the many women who shared my background, I would accuse Islam of being a sexist religion, discriminating, oppressing and giving men the greater privileges. All of this, coming from a person who did not even know Islam, one who had been blinded due to ignorance and had accepted this deliberately distorted definition of Islam.

However, despite my criticisms of Islam, inwardly, I wasn’t satisfied with my own status as a woman in this society. It seemed to me that society would define such terms as ‘liberty’ and ‘freedom’ and then these definitions were accepted by women without us even attempting to question or challenge them. There was clearly a great contradiction between what women were told in theory and what actually happened in practice. The more I pondered, the greater emptiness I felt within. I was slowly beginning to reach a stage where my dissatisfaction with my status as a women in this society, was really a reflection of my greater dissatisfaction with society itself. Everything seemed to be degenerating backwards, despite the claims that the 1990′s was going to be the decade of success and prosperity. Something vital seemed to be missing from my life and nothing would fill this vacuum.

Being a Christian did not do anything for me, and I began to question the validity of only remembering God one day a week – Sundays! As with many other Christians too, I had become disillusioned with the hypocrisy of the Church and was becoming increasingly unhappy with the concept of Trinity and the deification of Jesus.

Eventually, I began to look into Islam. At first, I was only interested in looking at those issues, which specifically dealt with women. I was surprised. What I read and learned, taught me a lot about myself as a woman, and also about where the real oppression of a woman lies: in every other system and way of life outside of Islam. Muslim women have been given their rights in every aspect of the religion with clear definitions of their role in society – as had men – with no injustice against either of them. As Allah says: «”Whoever does deeds of righteousness, be they male or female, and have faith, they will enter paradise and not the least injustice will be done to them”» [Nisaa 4:124

So having amended my misconceptions about the true status of women in Islam, I was now looking further. I wanted to find that thing which was going to fill the vacuum in my life. My attention was drawn towards the beliefs and practices of Islam. It was only through establishing the fundamentals that I would understand where to turn and what to prioritize. These are often the areas, which receive little attention or controversy in society, and when studying the Islamic Creed, it becomes clear why this is the case: such concise, faultless and wholly comprehensive details cannotbe found elsewhere.

http://www.facebook.com/notes/niqab-the-face-veil/why-are-women-turning-to-islam/278664861430

Hijab Should Not Make Us Stand Out

An article taken from one of my favorite fan sites on Facebook called niqab;the face veil.

One of the big misunderstandings people have about Islamic Modesty is that hijab (including niqab, jilbab, and a headscarf) is that it isn’t supposed to make us stand out.

The garments we are commanded by Allah to wear in the Qu’ran are supposed to make us stand out: from non muslims. We ARE SUPPOSED to were garments that dstinguish us/make us stand out from the NON MUSLIMS and the purpose of this is worship of Allah as One and Alone. When we were jilbab, khimar, and or niqab we are obeying Allah’s clear commands that we are not to resemble to disbelievers, and His instructions for doing so : to wear certain garments in a certain manner.

The not-standing-out part of hijab is not to try and make ourselves seem more important (in social standing or religious status) with our hijabs than another sister who is dressed in proper hijab. This is from back in the Prophet’s day when people used to wear their wealth in ostentatious and unnecessary manners to show of their worldly station (rich merchant, princess, ect) or who wore clothes in disrepair or didn’t wear shoes when they could afford shoes ect. (to make a show of their humblness). THAT’s what not what standing out in hijab means. It doesn’t mean that we are to dress as the non-muslims dress and disregard the clear commands in the Qu’ran. It means we are not supposed to use our hijab to gain reputation among the Muslims (TO MAKE US ABOVE THEM IN POWER, WEALTH, OR of the lack thereof.)

http://www.facebook.com/notes/niqab-the-face-veil/hijab-should-not-make-us-stand-out-from-other-muslims/290386001430

Salat is the soul of Islam

An article taken from one of my favorite fan pages on Facebook called: Manners in Islam. The link is below! Happy reading!

“Prayer is the soul of religion. Where there is no prayer, there can be no purification of the soul. The non-praying man is rightly considered to be a soulless man. Take prayer out of the world, and it is all over with religion because it is with prayer that man has the consciousness of God and selfless love for humanity and inner sense of piety. Prayer is, therefore, the first, the highest, and the most solemn phenomenon and manifestation of religion.” (Excerpt from Sahih Muslim: The Book of Prayers (Kitab Al-Salat) – Introduction)

Background of the Five Daily Prayers with Reward of Fifty!

The Prophet [S.A.W.] said, “Then Allah enjoined fifty prayers on my followers when I returned with this order of Allah, I passed by Moses who asked me, ‘What has Allah enjoined on your followers?’ I replied, ‘He has enjoined fifty prayers on them.’ Moses said, ‘Go back to your Lord (and appeal for reduction) for your followers will not be able to bear it.’ (So I went back to Allah and requested for reduction) and He reduced it to half. When I passed by Moses again and informed him about it, he said, ‘Go back to your Lord as your followers will not be able to bear it.’ So I returned to Allah and requested for further reduction and half of it was reduced. I again passed by Moses and he said to me: ‘Return to your Lord, for your followers will not be able to bear it. So I returned to Allah and He said, ‘These are five prayers and they are all (equal to) fifty (in reward) for My Word does not change.’ I returned to Moses and he told me to go back once again. I replied, ‘Now I feel shy of asking my Lord again.’ (Bukhari V1.B8#345)

When We Pray, We are Actually Speaking in Private with Allah (SWT)!

“Whenever anyone of you stands for the prayer, he is speaking in private to his Lord or his Lord is between him and his Qibla.”(Bukhari V1.B8#399)

The Mention of the Five Daily Prayers in the Qur’an:

“So glorify Allâh [above all that (evil) they associate with Him (O believers)], when you come up to the evening [i.e. offer the (Maghrib) sunset and ('Ishâ') night prayers], and when you enter the morning [i.e offer the (Fajr) morning prayer]. (17) And His are all the praises and thanks in the heavens and the earth, and (glorify Him) in the afternoon (i.e. offer ‘Asr prayer) and when you come up to the time, when the day begins to decline (i.e offer Zuhr prayer). (Ibn ‘Abbâs said: “These are the five compulsory congregational prayers mentioned in the Qur’ân).” (Tafsir At-Tabari) (18)” (The Qur’an: 30.17-18)

On Judgment Day, the First Questioning will be about Prayer!

“The first thing about which the people will be called to account out of their actions on the Day of Judgment is prayer. Our Lord, the Exalted, will say to the angels – though He knows better: Look into the prayer of My servant and see whether he has offered it perfectly or imperfectly. If it is perfect, that will be recorded perfect.

If it is defective, He will say: See there are some optional prayers offered by My servant. If there are optional prayer to his credit, He will say: Compensate the obligatory prayer by the optional prayer for My servant. Then all the actions will be considered similarly.” (Abu Dawud Book 3, Number 0863)

You MUST Pray – No Excuses!

“And if you fear (an enemy), perfrom Salât (pray) on foot or riding[]. And when you are in safety, offer the Salât (prayer) in the manner He has taught you, which you knew not (before).” (The Qur’an 2:239)

The Prophet [S.A.W.] said, “Pray while standing and if you can’t, pray while sitting and if you cannot do even that, then pray lying on your side.” (Bukhari V2.Book20#218)

Chances of Being Forgiven for Past Sins:

Allah’s Apostle [S.A.W.] said, “Say Amen’ when the Imam says “Ghair-il-maghdubi ‘alaihim wala-ddal-lin; not the path of those who earn Your Anger (such as Jews) nor of those who go astray (such as Christians); all the past sins of the person whose saying (of Amin) coincides with that of the angels, will be forgiven.”(Bukhari V1.B12#749)

Allah’s Apostle [S.A.W.] said, “When the Imam says, “Sami’ a-l-lahu Liman hamida,” you should say, “Allahumma Rabbana laka-l-hamd.” And if the saying of any one of you coincides with that of the angels, all his past sins will be forgiven.”(Bukhari V1.B12#762)

How We should Pray – At Ease and Not in a Hurry:

The Prophet said, “When you stand for Prayer say Takbir and then recite from the Holy Qur’an (of what you know by heart) and then bow till you feel at ease. Then raise your head and stand up straight, then prostrate till you feel at ease during your prostration, then sit with calmness till you feel at ease (do not hurry) and do the same in all your prayers.”(Bukhari V1.B12#724)

The bowing, the prostration the sitting in between the two prostrations and the standing after the bowing of the Prophet [S.A.W.] but not Qiyam (standing in the prayer) and Qu’ud (sitting in the prayer) used to be approximately equal (in duration).(Bukhari V1.B12#758)

Hudhaifa [R.A.] saw a person who was not performing the bowing and prostrations perfectly. He said to him, “You have not prayed and if you should die you would die on a religion other than that of Muhammad.” (Bukhari V1.B12#757)

The Prophet [S.A.W.] was ordered (by Allah) to prostrate on seven parts and not to tuck up the clothes or hair (while praying). Those parts are: the forehead (along with the tip of nose), both hands, both knees, and (toes of) both feet. (Bukhari V1.B12#773)

Narrated Malik bin Huwairith Al-Laithi [R.A.]: I saw the Prophet [S.A.W.] praying and in the odd Rakat, he used to sit for a moment before getting up. (Bukhari V1.B12#786)

“The Prophet [S.A.W.] in Zuhr prayers used to recite Al-Fatiha along with two other Suras in the first two Rakat: a long one in the first Rak’a and a shorter (Sura) in the second, and at times the verses were audible. In the ‘Asr prayer the Prophet used to recite Al-Fatiha and two more Suras in the first two Rakat and used to prolong the first Rak’a. And he used to prolong the first Rak’a of the Fajr prayer and shorten the second.” (Bukhari V1.B12#726)

Dhikr After the Prayer:

Narrated Abu Huraira [R.A.]:Some poor people came to the Prophet [S.A.W.] and said, “The wealthy people will get higher grades and will have permanent enjoyment and they pray like us and fast as we do. They have more money by which they perform the Hajj, and ‘Umra; fight and struggle in Allah’s Cause and give in charity.” The Prophet said, “Shall I not tell you a thing upon which if you acted you would catch up with those who have surpassed you? Nobody would overtake you and you would be better than the people amongst whom you live except those who would do the same. Say “Sub-han-al-lah”, “Alhamdu-lillah” and “Allahu Akbar” thirty three times each after every (compulsory) prayer.” We differed and some of us said that we should say, “Subhan-al-lah” thirty three times and “Alhamdu lillah” thirty three times and “Allahu Akbar” thirty four times. I went to the Prophet who said, “Say, “Subhan-al-lah” and “Alhamdu lillah” and “Allahu Akbar” all together for thirty three times.” (Bukhari V1.Book12#804)

The Prophet [S.A.W.] said: “Whoever recites Ayat Al-Kursi immediately after each prescribed Prayer, there will be nothing standing between him and his entering Paradise except death.” (Reported by An-Nasa’i and Ibn Hibban.)

Though there are numerous Ayah and Hadith related to Prayer, here are just a few:

The Prophet [S.A.W.] said, “The prayer offered in congregation is twenty five times more superior (in reward) to the prayer offered alone in one’s house or in a business center, because if one performs ablution and does it perfectly, and then proceeds to the mosque with the sole intention of praying, then for each step which he takes towards the mosque, Allah upgrades him a degree in reward and (forgives) crosses out one sin till he enters the mosque. When he enters the mosque he is considered in prayer as long as he is waiting for the prayer and the angels keep on asking for Allah’s forgiveness for him and they keep on saying: ‘O Allah! Be Merciful to him, O Allah! Forgive him, as long as he keeps on sitting at his praying place and does not pass wind.” (Bukhari V1.B8#466)

Rasulullah [S.A.W.] said “The covenant between us and them is prayer, so if anyone abandons it he has become a disbeliever.” (Agreed upon by Ahmad, Tirmidhee and Nasaa’ee to be authentic)

Rasulullah [S.A.W.] said: The similitude of five prayers is like an overflowing river passing by the gate of one of you in which he washes five times daily – No filthiness can remain on him. (Muslim Book4#1411)

Narrated ‘Aisha [R.A.]: I asked Allah’s Apostle [S.A.W.] about looking hither and thither in prayer. He [S.A.W.] replied, “It is a way of stealing by which Satan takes away (a portion) from the prayer of a person.” (Bukhari V1.B12#718)

Allah’s Apostle [S.A.W.] said, “Whoever does not recite Al-Fatiha in his prayer, his prayer is invalid.”(Bukhari V1.B12#723)

“If the people knew the Reward for the Zuhr prayer in its early time, they would race for it. If they knew the reward for the ‘Isha’ and the Fajr prayers in congregation, they would join them even if they had to crawl. If they knew the reward for the first row, they would draw lots for it.” (Bukhari V1.Book11#688)

“Guard strictly (five obligatory) As¬Salawât (the prayers) especially the middle Salât (i.e. the best prayer ¬ ‘Asr).[] And stand before Allâh with obedience [and do not speak to others during the Salât (prayers)].” (The Qur’an: 2.238)

The Prophet said [S.A.W.], ‘Whoever leaves the ‘Asr prayer will have all his (good) deeds annulled.” (Bukhari V1.Book10#568)

“Successful indeed are the believers. (1) Those who offer their Salât (prayers) with all solemnity and full submissiveness. (2)……And those who strictly guard their (five compulsory congregational) Salawât (prayers) (at their fixed stated hours).[] (9) These are indeed the inheritors. (10) Who shall inherit the Firdaus (Paradise). They shall dwell therein forever. (11)” (The Qur’an 23:1-2,9-11)

Let’s all purify our souls by offering the five daily prayers at their prescribed times with perfect wudu and Insha’Allah inherit Jannatul Firdaus!

and Allâh (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) knows best.

http://www.facebook.com/notes/manners-in-islam/salah-is-the-soul-of-islam/296268814194

“The believer will never have enough of listening to good things (seeking knowledge) until he reaches Paradise.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi
The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said:

“Whoever follows a path to seek knowledge, Allah will make easy for him the path to Paradise. The angels beat their wings in approval of the seeker of knowledge, and those who are in the heavens and on earth pray for forgiveness for the scholar, even the fish in the water. The superiority of the scholar … See Moreover the worshipper is like the superiority of the moon over all other heavenly bodies. The scholars are the heirs of the Prophets, for the Prophets did not leave behind dinars or dirhams, rather they left behind knowledge, so whoever gains knowledge has gained great good fortune.’” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi

Allah has given us many ways nowadays that make it easy to seek knowledge without any hardship and without having to go of the house; that is by means of cassette tapes, the computer and the internet.

Reading is so enlightening! It almost seems that as adults we forget about novels and literature that is not sanctioned by our jobs or school. What happened to reading for fun? Read a book, any book. You will feel very smart and accomplished afterword,i promise.

The Breast feeding debate

As a Muslim mother I fully support breastfeeding until the age of 2 years like the Quran and Sunnah recommend.

Mothers may breastfeed their children two complete years for whoever wishes to complete the nursing [period]. Upon the father is the mothers’ provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable. No person is charged with more than his capacity. No mother should be harmed through her child, and no father through his child. And upon the [father's] heir is [a duty] like that [of the father]. And if they both desire weaning through mutual consent from both of them and consultation, there is no blame upon either of them. And if you wish to have your children nursed by a substitute, there is no blame upon you as long as you give payment according to what is acceptable. And fear Allah and know that Allah is Seeing of what you do.2:233 Holy Quran

I often see  parenting sites that say breastfeeding until 6 months or 1 year is enough, than it is safe to give the child cows milk or formula if the mother wishes. As I am growing as a woman and a Muslim mother I am learning that the Quran has these rules about different things concerning parenting for a reason. Its because its whats best for the child. I came across this article confirming that it is safer and  that children who are breastfed for longer than six months could be at lower risk of mental health problems later in life, new research from Australia suggests. I found this amazing that science is always coming around and confirming what the Quran already says and keep in mind the Quran is 1400 years old!  The article is here, please let me know what you think!

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE60B4HS20100112

On the authority of Mahmood bin Labeed:The Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said “There are two things that the son of Aadam hates. He hates death, although death is better for the believer than fitnah (trials and tribulation of sins and doubts).He hates having a little bit of wealth although having a little bit ……of wealth is lighter (on the scales) of accountability”.(Ahmad Authenticated by al-Albaanee)

14 Biggest Parenting Trends of 2010

I came across this article while stumbling on http://www.Stumbleupon.com (check it out, thank me later) and I found it funny and interesting. I mean, I make every effort to be a modern parent but I found some of these “tips” ridiculous, I mean c’mon toddlers in heels? What happened to letting kids be kids. I really enjoyed some of the tips (#13-The Rise of Simplicity Parenting and #11 A Return to Camping) I really feel that kids will have every minute to be grown ups when they actually have to be. As with all parenting articles take it with a grain of salt and a good laugh and just do what works best for your family. I know I will.

You can read the entire article here:

http://parenting.ivillage.com/slideshow/parenting/14_biggest_parenting_trends_of_2010/

Please let me know what you think!

Def has to step my scrabble game up, I cannot believe I was beat by 20 pts!